New York, NY

This McDonald's is known as the "fancy McDonalds" because they have piano player, a doorman, granite table tops, and table service. When I walked through the door my monocle fell out of my eye. I thought "ohh my word, this place is even too fancy for me!" Unfortunately, I was woefully under dressed, but they luckily had a tuxedo for me to borrow. As I proceeded up the gracious stair case I admired the imported granite tables, I was impressed to hear piano player playing the moonlight sonata and shit. We were seated quickly in the "orchid room". This room was so fancy it made the Palace of Versailles look like a mere Buckingham Palace. We choose the prix fixe menu consisting of four courses. The first course consisted of a breaded and fried chicken cutlets with a crisp batter. This was paired with a fine vintage Sprite. The second course consisted of frites presented artfully in red cardboard tube with a thick tomato like sauce. The main entree was an enormous sandwich consisting of two patties, pickles, lettuce, and a three layer bun. The "special sauce" included in this sandwich danced over my palate like a ballet. The somellier was helpful throughout this meal. He recommended Coca Cola to complement the complex flavors of our entree. The final course was a desert pastry. It was a crisp and cinnamon apple flavour pastry not unlike those found in the finest bakeries of Paris. Over all this restaurant was the definition of dining excellence, and sophistication. The above is pure fiction. This in all actuality is McDonalds that looks fancy. Its just a McDonalds with the same lousy food you can get anywhere else.